Friday, February 21, 2014

Like waves in the ocean

Reading: Wilkie Collins The Woman in White - The world's first English detective novel by a phenomenal author! I'm only about two pages in so I can't attest to the actual story. :)
Watching: I must confess, I hardly watched a moment of the Olympics. I feel so unpatriotic. What I have been watching is When Calls the Heart, a television series based on the books by Janette Oke, although I've read the books (a long time ago) and the shows don't seem to have the same storyline. It's a Hallmark show, which means it's a tad cheesy. But when you're in the middle of a heavy dose of reality, cheesy isn't so bad.
Listening to: In Reverence by David Tolk ... it kinds makes me cry.
You know when you're swimming in the ocean and a huge wave comes along and knocks you under? You're stuck there, under the surface, bubbles roaring in your ear, salt water gushing up your nose.  It's not even scary, since it's happened so many times before.  You know that if you just let go, don't fight it, that eventually you'll be tossed onto the warm sand under a golden sun.  But goodness, how those few seconds between "wave" and "beach" can seem like an eternity!  Well, that's where I'm at now.

First of all, thank you SO INCREDIBLY MUCH for all your comments, texts, emails, calls and hugs.    The difference between where I'm at now and where I was a week ago is huge.  Your encouragement played a large part in that.  Someday I'm going to share it all with my girl and say, "Look, just LOOK at all the people that love you and are cheering you on!"

I started this blog over six years ago (!!!) with the intention of using it as a way to keep our friends and family updated on our little lives.  As a military family, there's just no way we can call/email every single one of our favorite people, especially when that number keeps growing every year and with every move.  But I realize that more than just friends read this blog.  And I also realize that the same stories I'm sharing with our parents in this space, I'm also sharing with people I've never even met, let alone know.  So sometimes I wonder if I say too much, or did I bring it up too soon ... And there's no right answer.  For some people, silence is golden.  For others, sharing is caring.  Obviously, I fall in to the second camp.

Weird week. No coats, but still lots of snow.

Social media - Facebook, blogging, Instagram, Twitter - can sometimes get a bad rap for increasing the quantity of our relationships, while decreasing the quality.  We can now move in some very shallow networks.  And sure, there are negatives to that sort of lifestyle.  But as a military spouse who moves every few years, and as a mama who spends most of the day within these four walls surrounded by my own four little ones, social media is often the only socialization I get.

I'm not the only one who likes my phone ...
I felt a little like the infamous "iPhone mom" these past few days - responding to a text while my kids raid the treat rack in the Target checkout, snagging a few extra minutes in the preschool parking lot to check Facebook, and even reading Google articles while my kids throw food at the dinner table ... but when your daughter gets diagnosed with a congenital heart defect and 12 hours later you find out the Coast Guard wants to move you 400 miles from your first "real" house, the iPhone starts to look a lot more like a life preserver.  So friends, thanks for clinging to me.

Building snow forts with Uncle Micah ...

Pennsylvania has better snow than Maryland!

And snow is even more fun when you're sharing it with cousins!
We made it back to Pennsylvania this weekend for a handful of family birthday celebrations.  As usual, the whole time we're packing and the entire snowy drive up there, we are regretting our decision.  But once we arrive, it's always good.  Because as much as I love social media, at the end of the day you just can't beat a real hug.  And between both our families and our church friends, Joci got her fair share of those! By the time we left on Monday, I was feeling so much more at peace - about Joci, about our next move, about whatever may happen.

Chilling out with the birthday boy!
And the Little Miss is doing just fine.  She's getting over her cold and I'm getting over worrying about her every rattled breath.  She's gone from waking three times at night to only two.  I don't mind getting up to feed her at all.  But I do mind not being able to put her back to sleep.  It doesn't matter how long or how hard she's been sleeping in my arms, the minute I lay her down she's awake and protesting.

It's exhausting, and rather than fall asleep in the rocking chair, I usually put her in bed with us.  And I love sleeping next to her, I really do.  She's so sweet and loves to be close.  She's asleep in seconds and any time she stirs in the night she just lifts her chin or sticks out her arm until she finds me and then settles right back down again.  I know this because I'm awake most of the time.  Which is why I don't really like having her in bed with us.  I would say it's uncomfortable too, but thanks to my postpartum carpal tunnel, I'm mostly numb at night anyway.

Naps were tough this week too.  Of course she WOULD fall asleep on me right about the time I desperately need to use the bathroom ...
 This week has been a good distraction.  Unpacking and laundry.  Preschool and MOPS.  Snow delays and 60 degree weather.  Real life taking our attention away from reality.  ... And no phone calls from the detailer about the big "move."


Jack loves watching men's gymnastics on YouTube.  We use the 2012 London Olympics promo as a reward for good behavior. ;)

"Mom, take a picture of me under the chair holding this ball, and Jude on top of the chair ... did you get it?  Did you get it, mom?"
We didn't see this wave coming, but we know how to tuck and roll.  We'll soon have our feet on the sand again.  Actually, solid rock would be much more preferable, but in this thing called "military life," sand is the best you can ask for!

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